Great Things in Small Packages

And I embarked then, on a life I had little enthusiasm or hope for, such was my emotional state. I could count on one hand the things that were going well for me. Hell, I could have gotten away with one thumb. My job was on an upswing. But at 26, who cares? I'd expected nothing less.

But life has a way of surprising us all, doesn't it?

Charlotte and Jack had moved back to town from the sunny south where Jack's career had taken them not long after they'd walked down the aisle. Charlotte was pregnant with their first child and they were temporarily living with (tolerating) my Dad (and brother Joe, no easy feat) while their new house had some work completed (like the removal of germ infested petri dish quality carpeting and the refinishing of the glorious floors they'd discovered beneath.)

In fact, it was Charlotte, once again, who helped me reach the conclusion that I needed to not go through with my marriage. I distinctly remember sitting on my Dad's sofa (while he eavesdropped, no doubt, pretending to be engrossed in a football game) and boo-hooing to Char about feeling dead inside. And she, enormous and wearing some spiffy acid-washed maternity overalls I am sure she has burned any evidence of having owned, had quietly and directly, without any sibling-rivalry fueled condescension, told me that people who are getting married do not feel "dead inside" and instead feel like all is right with the world, like they've found their souls, like their best friend and confidant was out there in the world and had finally found them.

OK, those were definitely not my feelings at the moment. That was for certain.

And now weeks later, after the three act tragic-comedy that was the breakup and move out, I was trying to reassemble a life, and had no flipping idea what it was supposed to look like when I was done.

I told myself I was a lucky person. Had always landed on my feet. I just had to weather the storm. When I'd met with Kate and the roommates at my new house, they had all been single and unattached, and shortly after having moved in, they all had found the loves of their lives. They said the house was good luck, maybe I'd find my soul mate through the magic of 223 Delmont Avenue.

And then, right on time, Charlotte and Jack's new baby came! A boy, just as beautiful as I'd imagined. He was the little swaddled distraction I needed to give me a sense of purpose. And I began to imagine that I could live a life much different than what I'd come to expect, and my heart would survive.