Out and About Once More

Joy picks me up at 5 pm to drive us both to the restaurant where we are meeting the rest of the girls.

It is Sunday so most places will be quiet enough to talk. I need to catch everyone up at one time on all that details of all that has transpired since I first told them anything about me and Scott.

We order wine. Kate brings me roses. I take a deep breath.  Joy says, "Ok, tell us everything from the beginning. Last kiss, last embrace, last time in bed."

I start with the weekend just before the storm.  I finish with Scott mailing my stuff.  It had arrived earlier in the week.  All but one print that he forgot to send.  All of it haphazardly thrown in a box, one or two things broken. Underwear mingled with bras. Makeup and hair products not sealed so as to protect anything from them. Shoes, pajamas, clothes all in a heap.

And no note.

Would it have taken so much effort to scribble something to make the whole episode less hideous? My hands were shaking as it was. I was crushed that there was no note. Not even a hastily unsigned, "Hope you are well," however insincere. Asshole.

The girls sit in stunned silence. There is an occasional question. They all reach the conclusion that he's nuts. Or has another woman. Or that he's figured out in the last round of the fight that he's gay.

I tell them that I remain baffled, am willing to believe anything.  But on the advice of Charlotte, I am determined not to waste one more minute of my life trying to figure out what the reasons are behind how and why Scott broke up with me. He clearly has a huge investment in me not knowing, so it must be something heinous. And every minute I waste trying to figure out the pieces to the puzzle is another minute I am not devoted to getting myself happy.

So lets go!  Let's visit a few high end establishments tonight, enjoy some great food, some outstanding wine and each other's unparallelled company. 

I get a message from Christopher while we are out. He's heard that a few of us are trying to get a sorority gathering together. Can he be an honorary guest?

I respond that we'd like to get together in the Spring but can not even begin to land on a month let alone an actual date to do so.

And then I feel compelled to explain Christopher and a few other kind hearted men from school who have been on my team of first responders these past few weeks. My girlfriends are encouraged that I am going to easily find the attention from men that I seek and will be in the game again shortly. I am almost ready to entertain that thought.

I message Christopher when I get home. I re-read my reply to him from the bar and think it makes very little sense out of context. So I clarify.

And he writes, "What if I just come up and you and I hang out together? Just us?"

And I reply that that would be great. Let's.

And for the first time in weeks, I turn out the lights and go to sleep with a smile on my face.