Facebook and Twitter and YouTube, Oh My!

I am truly a child of the 60s. I write letters. I open my windows. I place photos in photo albums. I go to the store and try on clothes before I buy them. I set the table. I write appointments on a calendar on my refrigerator door. Despite the fact that I am blogging, by today’s standards, I really am a throwback to a bygone era. Last year’s model. So last season.

(I am hearing the All the Family theme in my head again.)

So this is why I am in complete amazement that there are wedding photos on Facebook already, posted only hours after the bride and groom’s first dance as Mr. and Mrs. Two Left Feet.

What does that mean? Did all of their friends race home from the reception to upload photos and update their pages and write on each other’s walls? Is that what they were doing while the over 30 set retired to the hotel bar for more drinks and more dancing and more laughing about when we were kids? Has the social networking site taken the place of actual social networking?

Aren’t we missing the point here, people?

What’s next? The cyber wedding? Where we all get dressed up and sit in a wired restaurant and text each other from little carrels while watching the bride and groom IM their vows? And then send happy little emoticons?

Or was it Em and Chuck who posted the pictures? Did the happy couple spend their wedding night with lap tops instead of lap dances? Uploading instead of undressing? Friending instead of –--- nevermind.

It is just too demented and sad to let percolate in my head for too long. Imagine the update:

“Got married today. Now me and the little missus are in the honeymoon sweet (sic). Em put the Do Not Disturb sign on the door so no one would bother us because her wittle feet hurt from her shoes. She’s still got the hair all boufed up and the veil on. Don’t ask me how she managed to get the turtleneck on over it all. But she’s all cozy in her bridal Snuggy watching Gilmore girls. Me, I’m going to take the USB for a spin and see what Kodak Memories we made today. Thanks for the loot. I’ll upload video from Disney!”

Oh my.