Witchiepoo and Her Accomplice, Stupid Bat

Truth be told, I had no great desire for an argument. I will make one if taken to task, with the passion and rigor of a Vietnam War protester, but to say I relish an argument would be off base. I am more in Elvis Costello's camp. More peace, love and understanding, please. I'd rather we just decide I am right together.

What I'd hoped to do was to inoffensively put Endora on her heels. I simply wanted to her to know two things:
1 - J. and I shared everything, and neither of us kept any secrets, and
2 - I would confront her anytime I took issue with her mistreatment of me (or J. for that matter, or any of our children, if she so dare) and she should be advised to stop doing things that she needed to be confronted for.

I expected this episode to be peacefully and quietly swept under the family rug with all the other dirty little unmentionables.

She surprised me and called me back.

She'd taken 24 hours to arm herself with all the self-righteous shock and indignation she surely stockpiled when she played and replayed the voicemail message for the rest of the family support group. She called my cell while I was at work - and could not answer because of another call on my office phone.

Her message was forceful and indignant as though she was spontaneously reacting to my message at that moment. (Again, no Emmy today, Endora) I knew her tone was an attempt to get me to back off.

After shrieking my name she yelled, "I am NOT playing phone tag! I can not imagine what I said to J. that isn't true. Buh-Bye."

And I am sure she and the squatters and Sheila were cackling at the sheer brilliance of the comeback. Touche! I'll have to write that one down!

This is not my rookie season, however, and I was warming up to hit the cover off the ball..

I picked up the message just moments after it had been left. I closed my door, sat calmly at my desk and pressed re-dial. It went straight to voice mail, natch. Chickens.

I used the same greeting as last time. And then calmly stated, "Evidently we are going to play phone tag. I wasn't calling to question the accuracy of your statement. I was calling to understand why you made it - as it made no sense in the context of the conversation you were having with J. Unless of course it was your attempt at making trouble where there isn't any, maybe to level the playing field in light of the trouble that Sheila and her family have caused. I'd like a call back today. I may not be at liberty to answer as I am at work but I will certainly call you back. Good bye."

I called J. and related the messages verbatim. No secrets. Even when I behave in a way that gives him the vapors.

A few minutes later, he called me back. He'd just received a forwarded recorded message of the message I'd left for Endora.

Witchiepoo has boarded the Vroom Broom and is sailing about Living Island in her little pointed hat. Evidently with Stupid Bat handling the control panel. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/H.R._Pufnstuf#Plot)